Acceptance.....

Acceptance is a difficult art to master.  I am learning that is not about a lessening of sadness, or pain, or anger; rather it is the capacity to take it all in, feel it, and own it as your own. To know deep in your soul that you have no control over what is occurring or what will occur. Some things we will be able to do something about. The ones I am speaking of here are the ones we cannot.The are the ones that are so painful, that our soul cries out for justice, but we know on some level, that may not happen. Acceptance allows us to take that into ourselves, understanding that it may never be right, and say.....out LOUD if you need to..... I accept that. Then dealing with the emotional shrapnel with as much dignity as we can. IT means that even though our heart is shattered, our mental state- what we thought was a sure thing- has been dramatically diminished; at least temporarily, and our anger is screaming for revenge.....that we KNOW we will get through this. That some terrible things just happen; but now when they do we have this incredible gift, this art, of acceptance. Allow the pain to surge through you, mourn. That is what we do when we are sad.. Don't let some one tell you how long you have to mourn either.....oh HEEL no. Acknowledge it. Feel it. Morn it. Accept it will be part of you for a while. Allow the sadness to stream down your face and over your soul. Breath it into yourself and cry or weep or wail until you don't feel like you are dying inside. Accept that you have the right to be sad and mourn. When the rage rushes through your blood like fire. Clenching your muscles......even screaming out if you need to. Acknowledge it. Accept you are going to be angry and try to handle it as best you can. Allow yourself to be human and feel all you need to feel. Then try acceptance. IT is so very liberating. Look at the situation though your tears and say, this, here, I can do NOTHING about. I ACCEPT THAT.  I ACCEPT THAT I AM GOING TO BE HURTING FOR QUITE A WHILE. ACCEPT....AND THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT...THAT YOU ARE IN CONTROL OF HOW YOU LET IT CHANGE YOU.  For the  most part anyway. Accept you will have bad moments. But refuse to accept they will All be bad. Let it sink into your heart, your mind your soul. Let it give you a beautiful amazing serenity in the midst of hell. You can do this. Practice makes perfect. The first time I REALLY felt acceptance was when my ex husband left me. I asked him one more time if he would go to therapy or if there was anything I could do....he looked me in the eye, and I suddenly (at least for that moment ) became very calm. I knew he meant what he said....and I ACCEPTED it. IT was so liberating. I knew that what destroyed our marriage, was not me, and that I could have done nothing to stop it, and it was this huge weight lifted from my shoulders. Many other things occurred that did not have the same clarity, but at that moment, as sad as I was, I felt serene. I KNEW that this thing was going to happen and I just accepted it. My Mother later asked me how I handled my divorce so well. I said, I accepted how he was behaving, that it was happening, and I just did what I needed to do. There was no responsibility on me for what happened. Do yourselves a favor and learn this precious gift. If you have questions, hit me up on here or on facebook. <3 Mishka